Vanity
by Alastair Seki
Summary: Yay for character dissections! Comparisons are fun, too. Well, enjoy! R&R, please!
1. Sasuke

Hey, alls. I'm back again. This plot bunny bit me in the middle of an exam the other day, and has diligently hung on through two more tests. So, I decided to reward the fuzzy thing by caving to its demands. Thus, this story. I'm not sure if a lot of people will agree with me and my opinions in this little character dissection. Feel free to flame me with your evidence to the contrary! All such reviews will be carefully considered, and when decided to be either legitimate or ludicrous, they will be dealt with accordingly.

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Contrary to popular opinion, Sasuke Uchiha was not a vain person. In fact, he actually cared very little for what he looked like. A quick shower in the morning, a fresh shirt, a clean pair of shorts, a quick brushing of teeth, and he was ready to grab some toast and head to the bridge where he would meet his team. It wasn't his fault that his hair happened to dry the way it did, or that his clothing choice had become high fashion simply because he wore it. Fangirls can have that effect on the fashion industry….

Sasuke never really cared what people thought, either. They could think he was the coolest, most fashionable person in existence, or the ugliest one, for all he cared. People's opinions didn't matter, only his own. So no matter how annoying it was having people fawn over him for his fashion sense, he wasn't going to change it, because that would take effort, and they'd just copy him again, anyway. So he didn't bother.

Sasuke didn't particularly care about his facial features, even. Most of the girls (and even some of the boys) of Konoha made it annoyingly clear that they thought his dark hair and eyes mixed with his pale skin was the epitome of hotness. He never really understood that. What was so special about looking relatively normal? It's not like he had truly exotic looks, like Sakura's pink hair or Naruto's blue eyes. But, if people wanted to think it was special, who was he to judge? Maybe it had more to do with the actual structuring of his face rather than the coloring? To him, it really didn't matter what they thought. In all truth, he was a little resentful of his face, because every time he looked into a mirror he saw a face that looked hauntingly similar to both his mother's and his brother's. The first he could live with, the latter he could most definitely do without.

If people wanted to play him up as the village's most wanted 'hottie,' they could very well do so. It was too much effort to stop them. And Sasuke just didn't care that much about vanity.

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Hmm. He didn't come across as too apathetic, did he? I think he would be. About fashion, at least. But, meh. Whatever. ;-p


	2. Naruto

Welp, here's chapter two. Enjoy! Oh, and just keep this in mind; one being vain does not, by any means, mean one has table manners.

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Despite everyone's belief to the contrary, Naruto Uzumaki was a very vain person. In truth, he cared extensively for what he looked like. A thorough shower in the morning, the brightest shirt he had, pants in the best shape he could find, a measured brushing of teeth as well as a thorough floss, followed by a careful mussing of his hair around his forehead protector to get it to look _just so_, and he was ready to head out the door because he'd made sure to eat his breakfast ramen before he brushed his teeth. It just wouldn't do to have ramen-breath or noodle bits stuck in his teeth for the rest of the day. It wasn't his fault that his clothes weren't in the best condition and thus looked scrubby. He had limited funds and had to make his clothes last longer than they really probably should have….

Naruto really cared what people thought, too. He wanted desperately for people to think he was the coolest, most awesome person in existence. People's opinions were what shaped his dream; to be acknowledged. So no matter how discouraging it was, having people make remarks about his clothes, he wasn't going to quit, because it was effort he was willing to make. Someday, people would copy him. So he never gave up.

Naruto prized his facial features, as well. Most of the girls (and even some of the boys) made it abundantly clear that they thought his blond hair and blue eyes mixed with his tan skin was the epitome of ugliness. He never understood that. What was wrong with being exotic? It's not like he wanted commonplace features like black hair and dark eyes like most of the people in the village. Why did they like to ridicule him for standing out? Maybe it had more to do with the shape of his face and the whisker-marks on his cheeks which served as a constant reminder? To him, the current cause really didn't matter because he was going to change all their minds. But in all truth, he was very curious about his face, because every time he looked into a mirror he wondered which of his parents he looked like, or if it was a blend of both. He had learned to live with the curiosity though, because he knew no one would ever tell him.

If people wanted to play him up as the village's least wanted 'uglie,' they could very well do so. It just gave him more reason to change it. And Naruto just always cared that much about validity.

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There's something eerily familiar about this bunny. Hmm... (bright yellow bunny munches happily on author's bowl of ramen) ... Nah.


	3. Sakura

Okay, third chapter! Admittedly, I don't really like this one as much as the first two, but meh. I wanted to complete the whole 'triad.' So, here ya go. Oh, and I forgot to do this last time...

Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto, Sasuke, or Sakura. No matter how much I wish they were real. The boys need a hug, and Sakura needs some sage advice.

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Completely in line with popular belief, Sakura Haruno tried to be a very vain person. She tried to do everything a person is supposed to do to look good. A thorough, yet relatively quick, shower, a perfectly coordinated and nicely pressed outfit, both the brushing and flossing of teeth, a meticulous application of make-up, and a straightening of hair, and she was ready to leave for the bridge so she would arrive early; since, she never ate any breakfast because of the diet that she followed religiously. So it was entirely her fault that she looked as if she had copied a fashion magazine add item for item. Which was actually the exact look she was going for…

Sakura always cared what people thought, also. She knew people thought that she was one of the most fashionable females in the whole village. People's opinions mattered because she was always trying to make herself noticeable. She tried with all her considerable intelligence to follow the current fashion trends and predict what they would be in the near future. She wanted people to copy her, so she devoted herself to fashion.

Sakura mostly liked her facial features, too. Most of the boys (and even some of the girls) of Konoha made it rather clear that they thought her pink hair and green eyes along with somewhat pale skin was a rather attractive combination. She understood that. Why wouldn't they appreciate a little bit of exoticness? It wasn't like she had the rather plain dark hair and eyes that just about everyone else had. And if people liked seeing coloring that was a little exotic, who was she to complain? Because people didn't like her looks because of the actual structure of her face, right? To her, it was obvious what they thought. In all truth, no one could possibly think that her forehead was in any way attractive. At least that's what she believed to be true every time she looked in a mirror and saw that wide expanse of skin. She was somewhat disappointed that she had inherited her father's forehead, instead of her mother's.

If people wanted to play her up as the village's most wanted 'cutie,' they could very well do so. It just caused her to explode with euphoria. And Sakura just always cared that much about visibility.

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Okay, that's it. No more of these. Unless somebody really wants another character done... Well, I won't know that unless somebody tells me! (hint, hint) And for anybody reading this that also read Firm Touch... I'm working on it! Really! Chapter 2 has just decided to not crawl out of the recesses of my brain... Other chapters have though, and I've got it all planned out, but... yeah. I'll get there!


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